They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
