3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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