When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
His hands were made for my vagina.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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