So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
