I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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