Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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