I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
