let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
