Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Randomize
