i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
