question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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