She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
