if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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