sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
