I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
