I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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