i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
he just fucked me for my cheese.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
