I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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