Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I currently don't understand fingers.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
