Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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