Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
kristin has been a bad kristin
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
cat food counts as protein by the way
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
