well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Randomize
