i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize