Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
In other news, I just burned my penis
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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