I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Randomize