my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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