Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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