OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Randomize
