She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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