I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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