when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
