I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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