Umm I'm too high to move.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
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