Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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