If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Someone shattered a urinal.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
