I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
