I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
