I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize
