honey bunches of taint.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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