Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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