in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
