I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
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