i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
