these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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