Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
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