No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize
