I feel like I'm in dance class right now
If that was your dad, he is hot
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Randomize
