She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
only you would photoshop your dick
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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