I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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