belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Randomize
